So, that naughty little rich girl, Paris was apparently getting her lesbian kicks while she was in jail. This site opened today with an EXCLUSIVE, 22 minute video of Paris having sex in jail with another inmate.

Could it be that the “stupid, spoiled whore” (as South Park dubbed her) really got her kicks while in holding?

Doesn’t look sexy to me?

I heard that Paris was alone in her cell, with no contact with other inmates. But this is a picture of the cell Paris was supposedly in.

I don’t know about you, but the first tape was kinda hot when she was alone and other than that, pretty disappointing. I don’t like dicks in my porn. This girl on girl stuff with Paris in a jail cell? Oh ya baby…I’m all over that.

See y’all in about a half hour.

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There’s a lot of speculation about the next iPod release. It’s been a couple months since Apple threw out the iPhone, the new iMac is official and hittin’ it and current iPods have seen a price drop (something that only comes strictly mandated by Apple HQ). Retailers are continuing to say that Apple is slowing down iPod shipments, strongly suggesting the company is running out its current stock to make room on shelves for new product.

I can’t say what specific technology Cupertino’s got brewing behind the scenes. It’ll be OS X-based, and should use more flash, but whatever it is, I’ll wager on the release in September or October.

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Well, now I have officially seen it all. Apparently somebody got SO tired of getting their leg humped that they went and created this beloved contraption to keep Sparky from soiling yet another pair of jeans with doggy spunk.

I don’t know whether to be beside myself with hilarity or to barf my chicken wings from lunch on my shoes. Can you imagine cleaning this thing? I mean, call me nuts…but dog spunk isn’t something I want to be wiping down with my dishes sponge.

I suppose it’s only right to give them a sexual outlet, God knows that cutting a dog’s nuts off and just expecting him to forget about sex is just ridiculous, but damn man…I don’t know if I should go out and toss down some $$ for indulging my dog’s fantasies. Do you think they’re thinking naughty thoughts and saying “Ya baby…take that…you know you like it…take my red lipstick dog cock” etc…while doing this?

Do you think we’ll see doggy day cares in the near future with playgrounds that look like this?

What a world…

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Female escorts are so common online and off these days that I’d be amazed if you didn’t know about them yet. But most of the guys I’ve asked about them in the last couple weeks either didn’t know they exist or didn’t know much more than locker room rumors that were mostly wrong. So I figured I’d spread the word a bit. Maybe you’ve seen enjoyed 1 or 2 (at a time) or 39 in the last month on those “off” nights when a trip to the local ho hole didn’t bring home some pink taco.

So here’s the inside scoop from a buddy of mine who knows more about escorts than anyone I’ve ever met. This is a guy who paid for his first escort at 13, drove escorts at 18, opened an escort agency at 22 and owns the world’s largest escort community. If that’s not pimp cred, I don’t know what is.

An “Escort” is a woman who will spend time with you and/or perform various levels of sexual or other intimate (massage, dancing, skin on skin rubbing, BDSM, dominatrix, etc.) services for money.

There are escorts who will only do dinners, take vacations or just chat with you and there are full on porn star escorts (PSE), girl friend experience escorts (GFE) and every shade of escort in between. Escorts appeal to rock stars, wealthy guys, poor guys, perfectly normal guys who get laid all the time, fat guys, skinny guys, shy guys, quiet guys, loud guys, drunks, CEOs and janitors, elderly guys, women, couples, psychological conditions (insecurities, obsessions, performance anxiety), physical infirmities (amputees, the handicapped, the deformed, dwarfs and midgets, your brightest or darkest desires and most perverted fetishes and fantasies. They are the ultimate appetizer, main course and dessert. Oh ya, and they’re NOT your wife, girlfriend or rosy palm and her five sisters.

So, let’s say you live in Atlanta. You’re relaxing at your condo in Atlantic Station, it’s just another night, you’re alone and you’re considering beating one out. But why? Just head over to Beautiful Companion Escorts or to XXXcorts or to See An Escort or Swinger Escorts or even Xotica Escorts. These are all sites with direct access to the largest escort directory in the world. There’s over 10,000 escorts worldwide and over 100,000 escort reviews. In Atlanta, there’s over 400 escorts waiting for your call. Pay $1.95 to join and get access to all of the escort’s contact information in Atlanta or virtually any other major city in the world AND you get access to all of the escort reviews too.

Escort reviews? Oh ya, let’s go over those. Ever read consumer reports? Escort reviews are the same thing. If you’re going to spend your hard earned money on some female companionship, make sure you’re getting what you’re paying for. Prices vary wildly from city to city, incall, outcall and they’re largely based on services provided, the quality of the provider and your ability to bargain (or read escort reviews). That’s right, escort reviews not only tell you what she’ll do, they’ll also tell you for how much and how long. If that’s not worth the price of admission, I don’t know what is.

Use your common sense with the police and make sure not to get busted for saying anything stupid. It’s perfectly acceptable to say “I’d like to see you for an hour, what’s your rate?”. It’s not acceptable to say, “I want to fuck, what are you going to charge me for having sex with you?” It’s pretty rare that cops run stings on guys, but it does happen. You’ve gotta say something stupid like that to have any problems. You can learn all that you need to about how to have a blast in your home town and around the world in the member’s forums on this escort site.

Ignore the prudes, they love to crucify escorts and other ladies throughout history. Mary Magdalene got a bad rap.

Don’t be stupid, like with any chick, ALWAYS wear a rubber (if you were to have sex, that is).

So the long and short of it is that all you’ve got to do is pick up the phone or drop an email and you could be enjoying the company of a beautiful girl in about a half hour. No more beating off at webcam girls for $4.99 /minute or watching the same ‘ol porn over and over on your computer or TV. No more of the same ‘ol pussy you’ve been fucking for the last 10 years (or more) or having to keep hiding what you’ve always wanted. Now you can just go on out and find her, she’s waiting, willing and happy to take cash or in most cases, credit cards.

Happy hunting!

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